So Where To Now?

Back to the after effects of the last few posts... All in all the whole situation was probably a good thing, it sort of shocked me out of the hole I've been living in. When you work at home you start to take your appearance for granted, I'm afraid. Especially when the only places I go seem to be the grocery store, post office and bank. And we'll have an occasional meal out, sometimes with a little neighborhood shopping afterwards (book store, Walmart, exciting places like that). And I'm a tomboy, I don't get along with things like hose, skirts, heels or even bras. I never have, never will.

So the first thing I realized is I have to start eating better and lose some weight. I was a skinny person the first half of my life and then it started to slowly creep up on me as my health declined, which of course made me feel even worse. And gave me high cholesterol. At 5'1" every bloody pound shows and even when I was 98 pounds I wasn't a good clothes hanger, I have an odd build, it's always been hard to find clothes that fit and looked decent. I have a medium to large frame for a short person, wide shoulders, large ribcage, no waist (I've got like an inch or two between my hip bones and my ribs), I wear and 8 1/2 shoe (and I have flat feet), and now I have the added problem of having big boobs so nothing fits right anymore.

I'm so tired of wearing big baggy tee shirts and knit pants. I want to wear normal tees and jeans... and boots! I miss wearing boots but they look ridiculous with my normal pants. So, I'm trying to eat better, snack less and next I need to start some sort of exercise program. I think I'll "restart" my yoga, at least it's something.

I'm working harder on my hair also. I've always had wavy, frizzy, fine hair and I'm one of those people that refuses to use hairspray or gel, but I actually bought some straightening gel this week. Haven't tried it yet, maybe tonight. I shower before bed, so the thought of having something in my hair freaks me out. But we're actually going to a movie tomorrow night (two weekends in a row, wow!). I also had a panic attack of sorts yesterday and toned down my hair color. I colored it about a month ago, my normal Clairol blue black, but I must have left it in too long because the color took more than it usually did and it looked a little TOO black for my complexion. My hair doesn't absorb color well so I've never had that problem before. I spent an evening playing at the Clairol Try It On Studio (I look cool with purple hair, who knew?). So I'm thinking I'll try and add some brown over it, but I'm broke and couldn't afford it, then I get home and realize I actually have some color under the sink from like a year ago. Yippee! I used to always mix dark brown and black but I've been lazy this year and been buying the pre-packaged kits. So I find a bottle of Miss Clairol darkest brown (neutral base) and just go for it. And it looks better, a little softer with more depth. Maybe I'll work back towards dark brown again, who knows...

What else?? I'm trying to dress a little more girly, not be so baggy, actually remember to put on a little bit of jewelry, use a bit of makeup for actual events like dinners out with friends and things. I bought Dr. Phil's book, I'm actually going to try and read it, I like Dr. Phil. I remember when my mom was my age she gained some weight and kept it on for quite a while, then her doctor told her to lose it for her health and now she's tiny. She and my dad used to walk every day, and both got in really good shape, though now they're not able to anymore. I'm trying to get my husband out to walk, the weather has been strangely "fall like" the last week or two. And he did go for a walk this week. Men can lose weight so easily, just a couple of little changes. He's likes to walk, I'm terrible at it because of arthritis in my feet. So yoga it is for now...

Next entry, I'm finally going to get to the Italian charm bracelets :-)

Posted by Morticia at October 03, 2003 04:55 AM | TrackBack