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I think the problem was when we went to the theater tonight I was in the mood to watch a vampire film, not a video game. Don't get me wrong, Kate Beckinsale is beautiful, the photography, sets and costumes are beautiful, it was a black & blue monochromatic piece of moving art (with the occasional brownish reds thrown in). The actors looked quite real, not nightmarish and jerky like in Van Helsing, which made me physically ill watching it. But it was literally one or two sentences of dialogue and then 10 or 15 non-stop minutes of MTV editing, over-the-top gore.
We also decided to go to the movies on the most depressing day of the year, but for some reason all of the gore and action didn't really do anything to cheer me up. And the plot they tried to throw in was so overly complicated and confusing that it really didn't feel like a plot. More like the histories they give you at the beginning of a role playing video game... which is one of the reasons I don't play video games anymore. But I never was a gamer, I just like to shoot at stuff.
And to add to the confusion, everything is so fast moving, dark and, well, blue, that it was visually hard to follow what was happening. Who just got killed?
This film has the feeling of a series of novels that were condensed into one short story, characters are introduced then dropped, there is the "previously on Underworld" introduction, maybe when the Director's Cut comes out on DVD it will make more sense.
But it was probably just me. I really wanted to see a vampire movie tonight...