I sat and watched Prozac Nation this evening, Sparky taped it for me ages ago, but I was in a weird mood and wanted to watch something dark and dramatic tonight, maybe to make myself feel better, and I'm 'sort of' caught up on my Ebay work so I thought what the hell.

We have HBO right now, and Sparky was bored himself yesterday and sat and watched Spanglish on TV, expecting a comedy, which he decided was a huge mistake afterwards. He said it was a depressing film about miserable people and it had a very unhappy ending.

Prozac Nation was also about miserable, depressing people but it had a somewhat abrupt kind of happy ending, she got on Prozac and, after a suicide attempt, she got better. I had never read the book, but I had thought it was more about her experiences with taking the medicine, but most of the film she's in psychotherapy, which looked about as boring and un-useful as the short period that I went through. I only went because in the early 90's my insurance required me to receive my prescription from an actual medical psychiatrist, and required a minimum number of office visits.

Now you could probably get anti-depressants from your veterinarian... or at least your OB/GYN doc. Which is not necessarily a good thing. Prozac can be a great medicine, or it can really wreak havoc with your mind and body. Or it can do both. It's done both to me, but I'm not sure I could completely do without it. I have managed to back off from 40 mg a day to 10-15 (I actually dump half of the 10 mg capsule out, don't try this at home). All without medical supervision, because I do not have insurance, and even when I did the doctors I've dealt with have proven to be both uncaring and irresponsible about prescribing medicine, though I can see their viewpoint also - they see hundreds of people a week, they are overworked and understaffed, and the pharmaceutical companies are constantly marketing products to them, and they cannot keep up on all of the required reading. But don't get me started on the evils of the pharmaceutical companies.

But after a year or so of taking 40 mg of Prozac daily, I realized that I was actually feeling worse than I was at lower doses, and I was having lots of weird physiological side effects - such as feeling numb internally. Which was making it hard to do things like use the bathroom, I actually had lost my sense of feeling and could not use my internal muscles. Of course, the numbness could be sort of pleasant also, it masked some of the pain from my MS, but after my doctor gave me yet another medicine to help me be able to use the bathroom (Bethanechol aka Urecholine), I realized that this whole situation was terribly warped. Also the new medicine was horrifically expensive, which prompted me to reevaluate what I was taking and start hunting for side effects.

Back when I could take antihistamines (they cause an allergic reaction on me now, see 300 things) I used to take the super-allergy med Seldane. My allergist was giving it to me up to twice a day (it was a once a day drug), along with another daily new allergy medicine called Hismanal. I started having heart palpitations, so I went to my GP doc, who sent me in to have heart testing, I even wore a holter monitor for 24 hours, and they couldn't find anything other than my mitral valve prolapse. No one ever questioned what I was taking daily as a possible cause. But then one day I stumbled upon a sheet of Seldane side effects and - wow - heart palpitations were up high on the list. I backed off on using it, and the palpitations went away. Seldane was pulled from the market not long afterwards because patients were having serious heart problems. And I was taking a triple dosage each day under the advice of my doctor. So I'm not very trusting of most doctor's standardized prescriptions and opinions, I don't fit the standardized patient mold.

But I've been carefully backing off on the Prozac, trying to keep it to the 10-15 mg level. I was very lethargic a few weeks ago and I jumped back to 20 mg and it made me pretty manic, so I went back to 10. Physically things seem to be working a little better, though everything does hurt more. But my brain is a little clearer, my OCD is still tormenting me, but I care more about things. The higher dosage made me feel very mentally numb also, I lost interest in a lot of things. I thought I was just getting older and more jaded, but I know a lot of it was the Prozac turning the volume down on everything. Which, like I said, can be nice at times. If it weren't for my stomach problems I could very easily become addicted to things like painkillers just to NOT feel all of the weird signals my body is sending out constantly. But painkillers make my stomach hurt and make me feel like I need to be eating all the time, which is not good.

The other thing I noticed immediately was that time seemed to move at a normal speed again. It was actually quite slow now. I had a lot more time in my day to get things done. Almost too much time. Before, life just kind of whirred past me in a blur, I would spend whole days getting nothing accomplished yet feeling like I was always busy, just really ineffective. So that's one of the ways I'm judging if I'm on the right dosage now, if time seems to be passing at the correct speed. I'm wondering if I'm a little bipolar, though. I have times where I can get lots done and other times when I just feel paralyzed and can't seem to get anything done, can't even start. Like typing entries in my weblog, or even answering emails from friends. I need to find a balance between the all or nothing mentality. Logically I know it's a problem, and my conscience will make me do things I have to do when I'm feeling paralyzed, but it's hard. My poor husband has been wondering why he sometimes gets some really weird choices for dinner and at other times I just dive in and cook something, but when I'm paralyzed even thinking of what I'd like to eat is nearly impossible, let alone shopping for it and cooking it.

But it's probably just my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder acting up, I don't get the euphoria that people that are truly bipolar describe, I just feel like I need to work and get as much done as I can before I crash again. Or it might be my Multiple Sclerosis, that messes with your brain also. When you've got so many things going on at once it's hard to single things out as individual problems. But I've been eating some seriously crappy food lately, I know I need to work on that problem. And I need to do something to move my body more. My latest healthy obsession is with Shakira and her music. Listening to her (and watching her perform) is very inspiring and is hitting someplace deep inside me that remembers I used to love to dance.

Royal Street at night.. click on the image to see the larger photo in a new window


I have lots of photos of New Orleans (B.K.) that I've taken over the last few years that I've been meaning to put up on the New Orleans page of my main website, so I'm going to post some here just to give myself something positive to do. I've also been meaning to change the focus of the page away from Anne Rice and more towards New Orleans in general. I haven't read an Anne Rice book in years (nothing personal, too busy), and the annual parties are (were) mostly very small private affairs that I did not attend. And Ms. Rice has finally moved away from her beloved NOLA (did she know something we didn't?).

People write me occasionally to ask me what to do, where to go in New Orleans, and want details on the disbanded fan club, but alas, I don't live there, I'm just one of the many people who worship the city. I grew up going on vacations there with my family, went there many times as an adult to visit, attended quite a few of the ARVLFC balls, and my best friend (who grew up in the area) moved back there at the turn of the century.

It's always been my dream to live there, I figured I'd probably move there when I was older and my family in Houston no longer needed me. I even considered joining the police department back during a solo 1989 trip, but the salary was so low it wasn't really a practical option.

To those of us who grew up on the Gulf Coast, this is our 9/11. Except imagine the buildings burning for days on end, instead of hours. People stood in the gaping, broken windows for five days, pleading and screaming for help... At least they have finally cleared the Superdome and Convention Center, that was just too heartbreaking to watch. Especially when celebrities and news crews didn't seem to have any problems getting in, but the government seemed to be completely baffled, as if they had never seen water before.

I've been listening to Cassandra Wilson's Belly of the Sun on repeat this evening, Songs like "You Gotta Move", "Darkness on the Delta" and "Shelter From the Storm" are even more poignant and moving than usual.

And an added note, before Sparky went to bed he was flipping channels and we saw Celine Dion's hysterical outburst on Larry King (I think she was also one of the few that spoke off script in the 9/11 concert, I'm not a fan, but I admire her heart), and Kanye West's complete comments from the Friday night Hurricane Concert. (Poor Mike Myers) But I must disagree, Dubya doesn't just hate black people, he hates all Americans (except the very elite, and those in the Federalist Society I suppose).

I must be in a particularly dark mood lately, all of my recent music has been screaming, wailing, and potentially violent women, lucky Sparky, huh? And no, I haven’t gotten Courtney Love’s newest CD yet, though I admit to being a huge fan of Live Through This.

I’m currently obsessed with The Dresden Dolls, who I found at one of Borders listening stations, however they didn’t have the right CD in the slot so I ended up getting it at Best Buy instead on a whim without hearing it. The description at Borders was ‘fans of PJ Harvey will like it’, which is true I suppose. I hadn’t heard any of PJ Harvey’s newer stuff, the only CD I own of hers is from the early 90’s (Rid of Me), and the lead singer Amanda Palmer does have a deep, strong, dark-edged voice, and she has the same raw emotion. There’s also a little bit of Nina Hagen in the mix also.

We were at Borders again tonight and I actually did listen in on PJ Harvey’s latest, from the few tracks I heard before being dragged away to check out, she sounds as if she’s mellowed out a lot. I hope the same does not happen with The Dresden Dolls, this is the freshest, most original CD I’ve heard in ages. The female vocalist also plays piano (big fave instrument of mine), and she pounds away with the ferocity of Tori Amos or even Nina Simone.

The cover art (and name) originally caught my attention, it looked very 30’s cabaret but with a gothic/punk slant. The actual music is not particularly dark, more sarcastic and sometimes angry, but it does honestly sound like gothic cabaret punk. It’s not anywhere close heavy metal at all, but for weird some reason Jack Off Jill comes to mind, though actually Switchblade Symphony would be a much better comparison. The lyrics and music are all over the place but flow together nicely, from the whimsy and heartbreak of “Coin-Operated Boy”, the sarcasm of “Good Day”, the smart psychotic punk energy of “Girl Anachronism”, and a retro ballad worthy of Meatloaf with “The Jeep Song”. Every song on the album is amazing and redeems my faith in current music.

But listen for yourself, the first playing sort of caught me off guard because it was so different, but now the majority of the album is stuck in my head. And visit their gorgeous website, there are photos, downloads, videos, lyrics and more. I’d love to see them in concert, there is a video of “Girl Anachronism” on the CD and they look as wild as they sound, it looks like they’re scheduled to be on Jimmy Kimmel Live on August 19th so “check your local listings” as they say.

Speaking of talk shows, I saw Sonic Youth on either Letterman or Conan a few weeks ago and they played a track from their new album Sonic Nurse which got me hooked and I had to go out and get it. I have one of their 90’s albums also (Experimental Jet Set...) and thought they were good but they really have a deeper, richer more listenable sound now. I’m not big on guitar haze music usually, but this album will stick with you. It might be my imagination, but the recurring hook, which starts with the “hit”, “Unmade Bed”, and seems to continue through the album, reminds me or The Cars “Moving in Stereo”, but I’m a big 1980’s New Waver and part of my brain never got past 1984 musically so I’m predisposed to hearing strange things like that.

More weird and wonderful female vocal fronted albums I’ve recently been obsessed with include the Yeah Yeah Yeahs Fever To Tell, Pretty Girls Make Graves The New Romance, and The Sounds Living in America. I’m a girl band fan, I admit it.

I also got some free credit from Amazon and picked up an early Kim Deal side project, The Amps. The music is good but the recording sounds a little too garagey (that’s not a word, sorry). I had been on a Pixies, Breeders & Belly kick lately so I thought I’d pick up this one too. I think I’m going to need to break it in a bit more to get used to it. Did I mention I never listen to the radio anymore? I actually don’t even have the stations set in my car radio, I’d rather discover my music over the internet and from word of mouth.

I've been kind of in a funk today, then I clicked on an email a friend sent and my iTunes automatically popped open to play the snippet that was attached. And, because of poor alphabetization, some of my Yeah Yeah Yeahs songs popped up to the top. I've only seen the video to Maps, which is mesmerizing, so out of boredom I listened to some of their other songs that were, um, in my files. Now I've got to get the album. They remind me of a lot of the early girl punk - New Wave groups, just totally doing their own thing. The lead is kind of Siouxsie-esque.

Then I scrolled down a bit and the tracks from my two Altered Images albums that I painstakingly transferred from vinyl to CD, and were in correct alphabetical order, appeared, so I listened to them for an hour or so and felt like I was 19 again. Altered Images were another very weird UK New Wave group that most people haven't heard of, you sort of had to frequent clubs and alternative record stores in the early 80's to know who they are. Amazon has the two albums I bought new way back, Happy Birthday and Pinky Blue, just recently released on CD for like $21 each, yikes, imports... ooh, extra tracks! They also have a good little best of CD (with song samples online) for $11.

It may sound silly now, when there are so many easily available choices when it comes to music, but New Wave and punk rock music changed my life in college. Growing up in the 70's with some of the scariest pop music ever, not to mention non-stop disco would numb most people's ears to just about anything playing on the radio. Nothing against classic rock, I still love it, but after hearing the same songs for almost a decade a breath of fresh air was nothing short of exhilirating.

OK, I've seen the new fashion trend for teens, on SNL tonight Avril Lavigne wore a bright red swimsuit under black jeans so low you could see the top of her legs. At least it's not a slutty look since she had something on underneath that wouldn't ride-up. Not a real flattering look for her, since she's so tiny, made her legs look way too short but it looked good with a guitar held in front of her for TV.

So look for teens to be sporting one piece swimsuits, maybe it will even increase sales and anything that covers up their navels and butt cracks is fine by me. You heard it here first... Avril is a great role model for girls who aren't slutty, I'm looking forward to her new album, the two songs she did tonight were very promising :-)

Late as usual, so I'm postdating this one by a few hours to be on the right day...

Sparky and I had our 14th anniversary today, or our 7th in my parents and the state of Texas eyes. We got married on the same date we met so we could keep it simple in our mind. We went to the same seafood restaurant that we did last year, and I ate the same thing, broiled shrimp, scallops, oysters and a stuffed crab. And I broke my diet a bit for a piece of their key lime pie ;-) My parents gave us a "universal gift certificate" (cash) to eat at Macaroni Grill also, but I think we'll do that next week because farfalle alfredo con pollo is really off my diet. So we've officially been married now longer than we lived together, which was already the longest relationship either of us had survived. It's a nice feeling, we've got the house, no kids, and can work from home without too many worries (knock on wood). We exchanged cute cards, and he proudly wrote on mine the first thing I said to him this morning, 14 years later, and her only request is "Don't fart on me". OK,I did say that, but I prefaced it with "please".

Then we drove around the Westheimer area, which we hardly ever go to anymore because of all the traffic and construction, and went to a new & used DVD store that some of Sparky's friends had been telling him about. He ended up buying one DVD and I bought three CDs. I have a "look for cheap" list for when we go shopping to replace some of my old cassettes and things and managed to get two of my Pixies CDs new for $10.99 each (Surfer Rosa and Trompe le Monde) and the latest David Bowie CD Reality, which is playing now and sounds very much like Heathen, which is next up on the CD changer. Hmm, Amazon has the same price on the two Pixies CDs and the Bowie CD for a buck less, oh well. I have a huge Amazon wishlist, lots of things to get when I get a windfall, or business gets better. I'm glad they let you rate the items now, because I have lots of "maybes" on my list and it's nice to be able to see the "must haves" first... Damn, Amazon's selling diamond jewelry now?

Time to take Phoebe in for her annual checkup, she's got some itchy spots that don't look like fleas, poor thing. I changed her food last time from the Hill's Science Diet for Sensitive Skin to the new one they just came out with the Advanced Protection one, but I'm going to switch her back. We killed another feather toy last night and they're hard to find in stock at Petsmart so I looked them up online and found them at a place called PetfoodDirect.com. Shipping was like $6.99 for just a couple of them or a lot, so I picked four and then wondered how much more it would be to order her food and it was only another dollar so I added it on also. And got an extra 5% off (and after I checked out got a pop-up for 20% off, dammit!). I've never bought pet food online before, this is a new experience. I really like that brand of feather toy, though, it has the nicest wand (doesn't hurt my hand) and the feather swivels nicely and makes little swooshing sounds.

Oh yes, bad news, turns out my mother does have a small fracture in her hip but the doctor says it's already mending and won't need surgery. I've been trying to figure out what I can do to help them the next month or two while my mom has to rest and stay off her feet. I've looked into meal home delivery for them, I know when I worked downtown a lot of people would have their lunches delivered daily. She didn't sound too enthusiastic when I mentioned it, but two months is along time for my dad to have pick up their dinner daily and I'm not much of a cook at all. I'm still trying to figure out what we can eat regularly to substitute for the pasta I'm not supposed to have anymore. I love beef, but chicken bores me and I'm not a fish fan. I'd eat shrimp every day if I could but we'd go broke ;-)

Spent all night listing DVDs on eBay and I think I'm officially braindead now... Sparky went to a film party so it was just me and Phoebe, we had a nice quiet no TV evening. Started the new birth control pill last night, not freaking out yet but I didn't take a break so I still feel all PMS-ey.

Listened to my new CD tonight, Horace Silver's Song For My Father, which I've been looking for on and off ever since I heard it playing in a book store one night (Rikki, don't lose that number...) very nice album. I like my jazz with a lot of piano, a few songs are heavy on the brass but not too much. It's weird, it took me like 30 years to realize how much I like to hear piano music especially, Elton John and Vince Guaraldi have always made me irrationally happy and improve my typing, which was awful tonight. I always wanted to learn to play and was jealous of my friends who actually had pianos in their houses. I had three guitars and sucked both acoustically and electrically :-(

I bought the CD when I bought the GoLive book, which I returned last night. I hope my manuals from Adobe come soon, I paid for 2 day shipping on a whim, if they show up Monday I'll be amazed. Adobe didn't bother to provide me with any tracking info, however. We went to see Kill Bill Volume 2 last night, really good movie but not quite as much fun as the first one, more story, less action. Still a really good movie, though, great fight scene with Daryl Hannah. Quentin Tarantino's amazing, Pulp Fiction is one of those movies I can't flip past on TV without mindlessly sitting and watching the whole thing. We got Kill Bill Vol. One on DVD when it came out, there is the cutest picture of Uma Thurman's Bride action figure, and a Go-Go figure too, where would I put them though?

What else have I forgotten... Well, the one year anniversary of the war, of course. All the peace marches that went on around the world. I've been looking at a lot of political sites and blogs, have more links of interest to add this week. Sparky and I are eagerly watching to see if the not-so-liberal media is going to stay on the Richard Clarke story, this is the strangest administration I've ever seen, though, they're seemingly bulletproof. I think if someone had an actual video and witnesses of Bush drowning a puppy the diehards would still say it was false. I'm honestly not sure what evidence people are going to need to see through what's going on right in front of them. If only we could catch him getting a blowjob... I'm going to make a new category for Political Rants, I think, there's going to be too much going on the rest of this year and I'll need a place to put it. A friend recently accused me of hating Dubya and his buddies, I don't hate them, they scare the crap out of me! For more of my opinions on this, see these wonderful buttons.

Read a terrific article by Unique Snowflake on the evils of political polls, which I still propose is the reason Kerry won everything, sort of a lemming type thing. Sparky watches the talking heads all day on CNN and MSNBC, they just give me headaches. Hours and hours of time to fill, so they fill it with their unfounded guesses on who's winning what, what so and so is going to do next, it's such crap. It annoys me even more than the constant celebrity coverage of who is dating who, what they're wearing, who might win what awards (who cares!!). But the political polls are scary because they actually affect the way the sheep vote. I know we're in a seriously desperate position right now (the impending end of the world, the end of our civil liberties, etc.) but can't we exercise at least a little bit of free thought?

Also this past weekend marked the Spring Equinox, a happy Ostara to everyone. Thanks to Bacon, Cheese & Oatcakes for the excellent link, I was at a loss. (I spent the weekend blog surfing, found lots of Pagan links and yet another category to add!) Due to my non-stop crappy health I stayed home instead of participating in the services. It's hell being Wiccan when your allergies won't let you go outside and incense sends you into sneezing convulsions :-(

Oh yes, and I got to see Courtney Love going apeshit wild on Letterman last week which was lots of fun, though her arrest the next day was stupid. I still want her new album, though, it's being compared with Live Through This, you've got to admit, the girl can rock.

My beloved eBay screwed me over again this past week by basically eliminating every single subcategory for their DVD section (and music also) without telling anyone in advance. I spent almost an hour the other night having a panic attack thinking my listing program wasn't working then realized it was eBay's fault. So now if I want my DVD listings to be halfway searchable I'm going to have to manually revise every auction I list to add their "item specifics", which my listing program people can't add (they're freaked out by the changes also). I think it's all part of eBay's plot to force everyone to use their "pre-filled" stock descriptions and photos for entertainment items, which I'd rather not use, thank you very much. eBay doesn't even bother to offer any Mac compatible software and now they're trying to run all the third party software companies out of business, what are they thinking? I see they're also playing with the URL's for our stores, which can't be a good thing. I'm having some serious PMS this week, I don't need something else to piss me off...

Oh yes, and we're STILL fighting the damned fleas! They're biting the crap out of me and Phoebe and I still haven't seen one yet. And most of our house has hardwoods, this shouldn't be that hard. We've sprayed twice, treated Phoebe twice and washed every piece of linen in the house at least twice. I swear, even when we leave the house I feel like I'm itching, this is driving me nuts.

Didn't do last week's questions, too busy and too old, I don't remember my teacher's names, way too many years ago. But I'll give this week a shot.

1. What was the last song you heard? I was listening to Pretty Girls Make Graves latest CD The New Romance earlier when I turned my stereo off to watch Conan O'Brien earlier (a nightly ritual if it's not a rerun). I think I was up to "The Teeth Collector". I haven't been able to get that one out of my CD player since I bought it, very addictive.

2. What were the last two movies you saw? Haven't been to the movies in a few months, been meaning to see "Monster" and I have a video of "Thirteen" that's been staring at me for a month. I watched "Lost in Translation" on DVD (loved it, thought Bill Murray should have won). Before that I think the last movie I actually sat and watched all the way through is "Message From Space" because Sparky was showing it on 16mm at the house for some friends, trippy 70's Japanese sci-fi, very weird.

3. What were the last three things you purchased? Nothing interesting, I went to the grocery store this afternoon. Got more Starbucks Vanilla Latte, some Diet Mountain Dew for Sparky and an issue of Cooking Light, which I haven't bought in ages, but the dish on the cover is pasta with bacon & cheese, yummm...

4. What four things do you need to do this weekend? Move more of my eBay pictures to my new webhosting service, work on my main website, call my parents, get St. Patrick's Day cards and mail thm.

5. Who are the last five people you talked to? The hubbie, of course, my cat, my dad, the clerk at the grocery store, and Pam at the post office.

1. If your life were a movie, what would the title be? Wow, probably "Enigma Girl" because I'm so weird. I was going to get that on a license plate once.

2. What songs would be on the soundtrack? The hyper 80's dance track would have Bowie & Queen's "Under Pressure", "No More Words" Berlin, "Cars" Gary Numan, "Dance Along the Edge" Concrete Blonde. "One Way or Another" Blondie, "It Ain't None of Your Business" and "Mental Hopscotch" from Missing Persons, Lene Lovich "New Toy", Nina Hagen "So Bad". The dreamy orchestral score would have Alan Parsons "To One in Paradise" and "Fall of the House of Usher", Pink Floyd's "Wish You Were Here" and "Comfortably Numb". From Suzanne Vega the remix of "Tom's Diner", "Ironbound/Fancy Poultry" and "Solitude Standing". Got to have some jazz too, Vince Guaraldi's "Linus & Lucy" and "Cast Your Fate to the Wind", Nina Simone with "Wild Is the Wind" and "See-Line Woman", Miles Davis "Autumn Leaves" And for nostalgia's sake, Gordon Lightfoot's "If You Could Read My Mind".

[More soundtrack additions - "Destroyer (Paranoia)" The Kinks, "Surrender" Cheap Trick, "99 Luftballons" Nena, "Vienna" Ultravox, "Destination Unknown" and "Words" Missing Persons, "53 Miles West of Venus", "Topaz" and "Roam" the B52's; "Come On Eileen" Dexy's Midnight Runners, "My Way" Nina Hagen, "Shake It Up" The Cars, "Welcome to My Nightmare" and "Only Women Bleed" by Alice Cooper]

3. Would it be a live-action film or animated? Why? Live action, don't really care for animation...

4. Casting: who would play you, members of your family, friends, etc? Reality wise? Janeane Garofolo for me, Tom Arnold for my husband, Laura Dern for my best friend... my family, my mom always reminded me of Joan Bennett, my dad is sort of a cross between George C. Scott and maybe Spencer Tracy, my brother would be Ozzy Osbourne (he actually looked just like him when he was younger).

5. Describe the movie preview/trailer. "She careened through her life at the speed of light, she faced danger on a daily basis and called it a job. She wandered the night alone, just a girl and her gun. She dated bad boys and drove fast cars, learned and lost a lot on the way but never regretted the trip. Now she's in love for real and settled down but the story is just beginning..."

Well, today was a whirlwind, I'm still hyper, so what am I listening to? Jane's Addiction, sort of matching my heartbeat and typing rate which is interesting... Got to get their new album, saw them on TV last night, they still sound great. Convinced my husband to get rid of his 10 year old recliner, I know it's killing his back and neck, I looked up one on LaZBoy's website, we went in and bought the thing outright tonight, very cool, easy commission for the salesgirl. I called in advance to see if they had any in stock in the showroom, we bought some furniture from them about 5 years ago and it had to be special ordered and took like a month, and they had the chair he wanted and in the maroon color he wanted (no more beige, yea!). He got the only red one in stock in the city, it will be delivered next week (we don't own a gas guzzler big enough to tote furniture). AND it was on sale with a trade-in discount, so he'll get something for his old chair when the Salvation Army comes to retrieve it.

I can't believe how easy it all went, and that we're not stuck with another piece of earth toned furniture (one sofa and chair still to ge replaced). His favorite color is red, the chair fit him perfect (it's their Atlas chair, it's the biggest, comfiest one they make, too big for me). I love LaZBoy's stuff, we bought a dual recliner couch and a big overstuffed non-rocking chair for me (I'm not a rocker) when we moved and they're so well made and comfy, well worth the investment. Got one of those pop-up coffee tables too, eat dinner on it every night. Their stuff is so gorgeous, I could wander around in their showroom sitting on furniture for hours [sigh]. They have a cool website, you can test out colors, test decorate rooms, etc. I've always wanted a chaise for myself, for the bedroom, probably end up with a smaller recliner eventually, though. We have an old semi-broken chair in there now to basically hold pillows and provide a kitty window perch, but it would be nice to have a real reading chair in there also.

I whimped out on taking my last steroid today, slept really heavy and fitful and couldn't face another 24 hours of steroid withdrawal. Restarted on my bc pills tonight, too, they don't play well together and I don't feel well when I'm off them, too many hot flashes and such. We went to the Adobe Cafe in Sugarland after we bought the chair, dinner was great but I have had a metallic taste in my mouth all night and now I'm getting a swollen lip on one side, more withdrawal I'm assuming. Took some Lysine, hope that stops the swelling. Went to Half Price Books after that, I bought four cat books (Cats in the Sun, Asleep in the Sun, The Mediterranean Cat and The Silent Miaow) and a new werewolf romance that I didn't even know was out (read the prequel as part of a supernatural trilogy). Couldn't really afford it all, but the photo books were like 75% off retail so I couldn't pass them up.

My nose has been cold for two days, very annoying since it's like 100 degrees outside. Been super dehydrated today, I expected that on the steroids, not afterwards. Uggh, my head's pounding, here we go kids... I've got my music stepped down to Bowie's Heathen now, finishing with Tori Amos Scarlet's Walk, which even relaxes the cat. Yep, she's jumped up in my lap and is grooming the both of us now...

Reallllly late this week, but too good to pass up

1. Name one song you hate to admit you like. Christina Aguilera �Beautiful�

2. Name two songs that always make you cry. I usually only cry at live performances.

3. Name three songs that turn you on. I�m not sure if they really turn me on, but:
Tori Amos �Liquid Diamonds�
Chaka Khan �I Feel For You�
Sheila E. �Glamorous Life�

4. Name four songs that always make you feel good.
Bowie & Queen �Pressure�
Blondie �One Way or Another�
Burt Bacharach �Bond Street�
Echo & the Bunnymen �Lips Like Sugar�

5. Name five songs you couldn't ever do without.
Wings �Maybe I�m Amazed�
Elton John �Funeral for a Friend�
Alice Cooper �Only Women Bleed�
Lesley Gore �California Nights�
Alan Parsons Project �To One in Paradise�

From Melissa at Anything but Ordinary�s �Music Meme� list which I couldn�t resist:

3 most diametrically opposed songs on my (current, everchanging) playlist

Jack Off Jill �Cumdumpster�
�Theme from Xanadu� by Olivia Newton-John
Nina Hagen �Springtime in Paris�

2 songs you wouldn�t guess I would have

The Archies �Justine� on vinyl
Mireille Mathieu �Hinter den Kulissen von Paris�

And kadyellebee�s cool addition which is funny because I was just thinking about this the other day

Good FAST driving songs

The last time I got a ticket I was listening to �Sky Pilot�
Guns n� Roses �Coma�
Meatloaf �Paradise by the Dashboard Light�
Aerosmith �Livin� On the Edge�
The B-52�s �Love Shack�
Garbage �Cherry Lips�
and Bitweever already nailed two of the best, �Radar Love� by Golden Earring and �Freebird� by Lynyrd Skynyrd

OK, that qualifies as a weird selection, you�ve got to agree...

The High Priestess of Soul, the great Nina Simone, died today at the age of 70. She is one of the few performers I really wish I'd been able to see in person, on vinyl alone she took your breath away. If you've never heard her before, here are some great places to start:

The Essential Nina Simone
Nina Simone & Piano
Wild is the Wind/High Priestess
Volume 17 - Verve Masters, Nina Simone
The Very Best of Nina Simone 1967-1972
and the longest version of See-Line Woman youíve ever heard is on Verve Remixed

More Nina Simone Websites:
The Nina Simone Web
Nina Simone Biography & Disography & Lyrics

1. What was the first band you saw in concert? Not counting the rodeo concerts at the Astrodome (where from a distance I saw such greats as Donny Osmond, David Cassidy and Sonny & Cher), the first serious concert I saw was Alice Cooper (late, like in 1990). I never went to concerts growing up, I detest crowds and have super sensitive ears. Alice was worth the humming, though!
ADDENDUM: OK, I did see a real concert, up close and personal with my parents in the early 70's. We saw Sammy Davis Jr. here in a small arena venue (in the round yet!) and he knocked me and my cynical little brother out! My brother even got to shake hands with him when he was leaving the stage. That would technically count as my first "real" concert.

2. Who is your favorite artist/band now? I love music way too much to claim favorites. Lately the artists getting heavy rotation in my car/home/Mac are Tori Amos, David Bowie, Poe, Tatu, Avril Lavigne and assorted jazz.

3. What's your favorite song? Way too many... as a child probably Gordon Lightfootís ìIf I Could Read Your Mindî.

4. If you could play any instrument, what would it be? I tried guitar, sucked at it, I always thought Iíd be good at the drums but never got the chance. I wish Iíd learned piano, itís probably mya favorite instrument to listen to.

5. If you could meet any musical icon (past or present), who would it be and why? For fun - Alice Cooper! There are many other people Iíd love to meet, Bowie, McCartney... but I think Alice would be the most fun and Iíd have the most to talk about with :-)

January is finally on it's way out, good riddance. To add insult to injury, I bought two double CD's at Borders Thursday night and both of them had damaged CD holders. I got the debut CD from Conjure One (a former Delerium member, with vocals by Poe, Sinead O'Connor and Marie Claire D'Ulbaldo) and the Winter Chill 3 collection, really nice. Winter Chill still had enough prongs in place to hold the CDs in, but Conjure One was crunched. They both have cardboard sleeves also, and I think part of the problem is they really shouldn't be jammed into those little anti-theft cases, it's just sort of sad. I exchanged the crushed one, took the clerk some real pondering to realize what I meant when I said they were "broken", she kept staring at it like "what's broken??". Another reason to order music from Amazon, perhaps...

Good grief, my mind's gone completely blank... Just for fun, and practice, I'm adding a photo category to the blog, nothing brilliant to begin with , just some of the cool things we have around our house. When the weather warms up for good, and perhaps some of the green starts to come back, I'll do more city hopping and get some artsier things for you to look at.

Almost forgot, my eBay meter turned over to 5000 today! Ironically, the deciding comment was left by a bidder I'd been a little worried about, because she was new and her Airmail package hadn't reached her as fast as she thought it should. I've got a green star now, only 5000 more feedback points to go till the next level... Actually I've received almost 7000 positive feedbacks, and left over 9000, but not everyone leaves feedback, and I have so many repeat bidders (and sellers :-) that only one per person counts.
* postdated entry *

It's the full moon in a few hours, this one is the Wolf Moon. also known as the Cold Moon or Old Moon. I was looking up moon phases to record in my non-pagan planner (I wish Llewellyn would make one that fits my Dayrunner binder, their Witch's Datebook is the right size but it's not hole-punched), and found a really cool site where you can look up the moon phase for pretty much any day and year, and I looked up my birthday. Not only was I born on a Wednesday, at four-something in the morning, but I was also born during the dark phase of the moon. Destined to be Goth or what? And a Capricorn to boot. My brother was born during the same phase, but my husband (the prosperous, lucky one) was born in the period just before the full moon, waxing, of course. Found a page with info on what it means for the moon phase you were born under, didn't really learn anything new about myself, but it says I'll enjoy the latter part of my life more than the early part, which is encouraging.

We're dripping pipes tonight for the hard freeze. I guess people up north don't have to do that, wrap and drip pipes for the cold. Your houses seem to be built with the water pipes safely in the ground where they belong. Ours down south run through our attics, where they tend to freeze and burst pipes because it's not supposed to get cold down here. So we have to run water in all of our indoor and outdoor faucets to keep it from freezing. One burst at my parents house when I was a teenager in an add-on wing of the house. It's no fun to watch water pouring from your ceiling, even less to try and find a plumber during severe weather...

We went to IHOP tonight, my husband took up the "All You Can Eat" pancake challenge. He only made it to nine. There was a table full of teenage boys in the next section who were seriously competing to get their polaroids on the bulletin board. One of them made it to 17, good grief. They walked past us as they were leaving, and my husband asked them "who won" and got a rousing chorus of "I ate 15, etc.!" and brags about who had to go throw up to continue. They were very proud of the guy who ate 17. They shook my husband's hand and gave him words of encouragement and advice. "When you get to 11 you'll hit the wall!" I had my normal blueberry pancakes and some of the nastiest hot tea I've ever had, I never drink hot tea out (with the exception of some first class Chinese restaurants), but I hadn't eaten earlier and I was freezing. I had to jump on our teenage waitress because it took her like ten minutes to bring it, my husband had already finished an entire cup of coffee (have you ladies always noticed they serve the men first?).

What other exciting things did we do tonight... we went to Hobby Lobby because my husband needed some Bestine, and I looked through their wall of little Johnny Lightning cars. I'm a classic car freak, if I can't have the real thing right now, I at least want a little mini version. Picked up a black 1967 Olds Cutlass 442, my dad had a blue Olds Cutlass convertible when I was a kid, I think it was a 1971, I remember it had a Rocket engine. My mom made him get rid of it much to my brother's dismay ;-)

Then we ran by Border's to pick up a book I'd seen the other night and couldn't wait to order through the mail, Too Loud Too Bright Too Fast Too Tight by Sharon Heller. "What to do if you are sensory defensive in an overstimulating world". Came out in November last year, so I figured I won't be seeing it on the used book shelves for awhile. Seemed like a good follow-up to The Highly Sensitive Person - How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You, which I found a few years ago. Excellent book, I'll let you know how this new one is. Oh, and I finally got Avril Lavigne's album, I hope she wins best new artist but it will probably go to Norah Jones, that's on my "to buy list" also.

Holy crap, just looked at the thermometer, it's 34! I'd better go check all the faucets again, just in case.

It's so bloody cold here! I haven't been warm in weeks, and we have a new cold front coming through this morning. I don't handle cold well, I was born in Houston, it causes me actual physical pain. It doesn't get nearly as cold here as it does in most places, but this city isn't equipped for the least bit of cold. On the other hand, I read somewhere they we are the most air-conditioned city in the US, we have horrendously hot, humid summers. But we don't hang out outside and most homes have central air :-) Our house has a relatively new heat/AC system, new storm windows and it's still too cold. How do you folks up north stand it? The coldest place I've ever been was to Kansas in February. It wasn't snowing but it hurt to breath, and everywhere we went the people had their heaters turned up to like 80 degrees. We had to open the door to our hotel room to cool it off when we got there. We've been running our heater at like 71 degrees, which is usually way too hot, but I think the non-stop cold has creeped into the walls...

I had to drag out a second blanket to add to the bed, I've been piling assorted throws on top of me to no avail the last few weeks. I wasn't going to bother with it, because usually cold spells here only last a few days, but this winter has been been steadily cold, clammy and wet. Then I heard the weather "warning" about the front coming in. Call us sissies, but I'd challenge you to spend a few weeks in August here ;-)

Ironically, we went shopping tonight and I bought a CD called Winter Chill 06.02�. Actually it was the artwork that jumped out at me, and when I saw it was a chillout double CD I had to have it. The description is "30 Tracks From the Darker Side of Chill", how could I resist? Just finished listening to both sides, it's pretty good. I like the second CD best, it's slower and moodier. I love acid jazz, chill and trance compilations, they're great background music for working in the middle of the night.

I think the cold is affecting my typing, I'm very clumsy tonight. We have the shallowest bathtubs in our house, I can't take a proper bath in either of them, my "to do someday" list includes replacing at least one of the tubs with a nice deep one, it's one of my tricks to get warm during crappy weather like this. Kept me alive during the record winter of 1989 in Austin. But I'll have to settle for a hot shower tonight. Christ, I don't even like getting undressed when it's cold, and we have a 50's tiled bathroom, brrrr..

I drove around in the rain and horrendous traffic tonight doing my food shopping for our party so I don't have to deal with it Saturday. We're still cleaning house (dusting, uggh!), still doing a bit of decorating (got lots of orange mini lights this year, looks awesome and will look great in the photos). This is our 11th consecutive Halloween party and everyones food tastes have changed drastically over the years (are we all getting old or what?). Our main party staples used to be lots of chocolate, Halloween candy like Indian Corn (tastes better than candy corn), Velveeta and rotelle dip (nightmare to clean up and takes about 3 hours to melt in a crock pot), chips and more chips.

Somehow we've evolved to things like fruit and cheese, crackers and carrots. Our music has evolved also, from just Halloween staples (Monster Mash, anything vaguely Halloween sounding), then to 80's dance stuff (my choice :-), and lately to a combination of alternative stuff, dance, acid jazz, and a few spooky Halloween picks thrown in. I've spent the night listening to hours of my own CD's and downloaded dance mixes, etc. trying to mentally pick through it all. I've always obsessed like crazy over picking just the right music, though a lot of times I'm not sure anyone is even listening. Having a CD burner takes some of the stress off of me (recording 5+ hours of music can be a pain, I used to even have a mixer and mixed the stuff!)...

The last few years I've gone through and grabbed all of my favorites off of my tons of CD's and compiled them onto just a few to save time. Then each year I add some new stuff for variety and rearrange the stuff I already have.

MUSIC RECOMMENDATIONS:

For general eerie haunted house background, check out any of Midnight Syndicates CD's, Vampyre is their newest. You could just let it play over and over, or add the others for an evening of creepy music.

80's are always good, especially for dancing, snag "Best Of's" if you don't own too much original stuff. Good groups - Missing Persons, Flock of Seagulls, Book of Love, Devo, The Cars, Depeche Mode, Pet Shop Boys, Nena, early B-52's, David Bowie.

For sophisticated crowds, for more talking than dancing, check out the Ultra Chilled compilations, cool acid jazz with a beat. Also Massive Attack, Delerium, Supreme Beings of Leisure, Mono.

For a Goth party, the compilation This Is Goth is good. Groups like Switchblade Symphony, This Ascension, Mira, Shroud. Portishead is a spooky non-Goth addition.

Good general purpose party music: Garbage (Beautiful Garbage excellent), Bif Naked, Sinead O'Connor, Poe's Haunted, the Snealker Pimps, Dido, the Breeders (Last Splash is still the best), the B-52s's Cosmis Thing is a party on a CD, a little Alice Cooper (Nightmare of From the Inside) add a little spookiness, as does Siouxsie.

FOOD FOR ADULTS (easy to serve stuff, feeds about 30 people):

Green or red grapes, with bags of already cubed cheeses
Baby carrots (already peeled and washed in the bag) and a veggie dip
Popcorn (buy it pre-cooked if you don't want to smell it all night)
Flavored chips that don't require dip are easy
Crackers and dip (I got Wheat Thins and some of that Brummel & Brummel fruit spread)
Got to have a couple of bags of Halloween colored M&M's
One or two more bags of miniature candies (stick with chocolate, Snicker's, Reese's, give the leftovers to the trick-or-treaters)
We tell our friends this is a BYOB party, but we get a couple of liters of Coke and Diet Coke, plus a bag of ice for everyone.
Plastic cups, plates and spooky paper napkins for easy cleanup.

Most of this week I've been in kind of a somber, serious mood (PMS, threats of hurricanes, who knows...) and I've had three Switchblade Symphony classics on the turntable (and in the car)�

The Three Calamaties
Bread and Jam for Frances (this is killer Halloween party music)
Serpentine Gallery

Follwed up by two by Mira� (Projekt Darkwave group)

Mira's self-titled debut
Apart

By Thursday I felt the need to perk up a bit and have been spinning the following on my CD turntable:

Pizzicato Five's CD single Five by Five , which isn't actually my favorite of their
many EP's, but I was in the mood to hear Twiggy vs. James Bond

Sacrebleu by Dimitri from Paris, more clever loungey
dance music with a sophisticated French twist (good party music)

Macy Gray On How Life Is (you either love her or she annoys the
shit out of you, but then I think all five of these artists are sort of
that way, I have a friend who actively despises Pizzicato Five)

Sons and Lovers by Hazel O'Connor, star of the New Wave classic Breaking Glass, which also has a killer soundtrack album

And the fabulous best of album, Death to the Pixies

I saw 17 year old Avril Lavigne and her band on one of the late night shows (Letterman?) last week and was stunned by how "real" she seemed compared to most of her musical contemporaries. The drummer had scrawled "Pixies rule" across the front of his drums and it made me very nostalgic, especially watching Avril hop up and down hyperactively like I used to circa '80 when I went out dancing. I had heard one of the songs (Sk8er Boi) from her debut album Let Go on the radio and the DJ didn't say who it was, but from what I'd read about her, I figured it must be her. Not to sound old, but it was so nice to see a young white girl who dressed, danced and sang like a normal teen girl. She didn't dress like a porn star, she didn't try and sound like Mariah Carey, her music seemed very honest and straightforward, like she actually was listening to the lyrics. I hope her style (of being herself) catches on.

Thursday afternoon and evening it was storming here in Houston, the power flickered but never went out. My email was still down (seems to be back up now), so I decided to redesign my husband's website though I had lots of other things to do, filling the creative void I guess. I reworked the entire website, finishing up at almost 7am. I learned to make those pretty little navigation tabs with the guidance of Scott Kelby's Photoshop 7 Down & Dirty Tricks (page 149, I had to look through four books to find the trick) and spent hours adding type, color, etc. Looks good, IMHO. Now I just need to finish redesigning my own main website, especially my Halloween area, which is 98% finished in GoLive, sitting on my hard drive waiting to be uploaded.

Suitable mood music for the weather and introspection included:

Deep by Peter Murphy
Haunted by Poe, one of my favorite albums
Tales of Mystery and Imagination by The Alan Parsons Project, a classic rock album based on the stories of Edgar Allan Poe, a desert island staple
Formica Blues by Mono, haunting retro music that would make a great 60's spy movie soundtrack
Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd, another must have

I've been having problems with my email, browser, weblog and even my car the last few days which all started on Friday the 13th coincidentally. I'm still not able to post entries as of 9/17, but here are all the playlists for the last few days.

Friday 9/13 - Entering PMS zone and in need of comfort music. Listened to Suzanne Vega all night. Solitude Standing, Nine Objects of Desire, 99.9 F† and Songs in Red and Gray.

Saturday and Sunday - Brain has reached sensory overload (decided to just skip my period and keep taking my BC pills non-stop). Played Jeffrey Thompson's Alpha Relaxation System� Active Relaxation CD nonstop. Nice soothing surf sounds and piano music....

Monday night - I actually needed to get some work done (EBay listings) so I needed something upbeat that I didn't need to pay attention to. Since I discovered the prolific German duo Rosenstolz last year, I've been acquiring everything of theirs I can get. They did a CD single with the mother of Punk, Nina Hagen and that's what caught my eye originally, being a Nina fan from way back. I just checked out their homepage�, they have a new album Macht Liebe�, yippee, looks to be only available as a single in the US but Amazon.de has the tntire album and a limited edition 2 disc album! I listened to a terrific compilation 3 CD set, Stolz der Rose - Das Beste und Mehr�, and two CD singles - Kinder der Nacht (seems to be out of print even at Amazon.de)�, and the previously mentioned CD featuring Nina Hagen and Marc Almond (formerly of Soft Cell) Total Eclipse 2�.

Tuesday night - nothing but silence in the house as I fought with my screwed up weblog (see Fumbling in the Dark).

Warning, I have really diverse tastes in music. About the genres I won't listen to are country and rap. In an effort to drown out the soundtrack to Barbarella (playing in my husband's room), I'm listening to these tonight:

Super Furry Animals Rings Around the World. This is the third album of their's I've bought (one is all in Welsh, haven't been able to get into it yet), but they are one of the hardest to describe bands I've listened to and are really in a weird class by themself.

Saint Etienne So Tough, a very early album of theirs. A British retro eclectic type band who has inspired me to check out other bands that have been labeled as "similar" by music reviewers including the wacky Japanese band Pizzicato Five (more on them later ;-)

The French equivalent of SE is Autour De Lucie, I'm listening to Faux Movement tonight. Really excellent French retro type pop band.

Garbage's Beautiful Garbage is in the mix just for fun. All of their albums are incredible, great driving music I discovered on a recent seven hour drive to New Orleans.

And because I was discussing Alice Cooper with my best friend on the phone earlier tonight, Welcome To My Nightmare, which I can listen to just about any time. I've been debating doing Alice's makeup for our Halloween party this year, I could be his younger sister. I have long dark wavy hair, a long Roman nose and deep set eyes. It really scares the hell out of my husband, who claims he doesn't really want to be married to Alice ;-)

(scary pic of me in the dark, with no makeup at all... even scarier)

I think I can pull it off, don't you? At least I won't have to wear heels during the party. I was Elvira last year, the heels are a pain on hardwood floors.

I've spent the day sort of wandering past the TV that my husband leaves on 24/7 (all news, all the time) seeing the flags, memorial services and catching too many flashes of Bush's face out of the corner of my eye. I think the nation is oversaturated with 9/11 programming, though the irony is we can never truly pay tribute to those who died a year ago. I live in Texas, I've never ventured as far north as New York, though my husband has stayed at the WTC Marriott multiple times... I can't even begin to imagine the pain the families and friends of the victims must have experienced this past year.
My goal for today was to write this entry and to listen to two albums, Simon & Garfunkel's Greatest Hits and David Bowie's Heathen. Why? Read on and I'll tell you the how they both relate to my personal experience with September 11th...

David Bowie swears that his latest album was completed pre 9/11, but upon repeated listenings, it's hard to believe.
If you've ever thought that perhaps Bowie really is a bit of an "alien", or even somewhat psychic, Heathen will validate your imaginings. The album and even it's bonus CD seem to be a tribute to our post-apocalyptic world and to New York especially. While the eerie undertones might have gone unnoticed prior to last September, in this overly aware world we live in today the songs seem to be fraught with hidden meanings.
Personally, I've been seriously rediscovering Bowie the last few years, Earthling caught my attention and I've been working backwards since then. The morning of 9/11 my husband and I were actually awake and had the ever-present TV on, we had appointments for our annual physicals at 9 am (CST). I work nights and rarely rise before 2 or 3 in the afternoon, which made the day even longer and more surreal. While I lay in bed trying to wake up, my perky hubby was trying to catch some of the Today Show before we had to leave, so the first thing I heard that day was "Come here and look at this, a plane has hit the World Trade Center!". OK, that woke me up.
We sat and watched the frantic and confused newscasters, and then saw the second plane hit, and the realization hit that this wasn't an accident. Then before we walked out the door to leave, the first of the two buildings crumbled to dust. Listening to the radio in the car, we heard the news that the remaining tower had fallen also. The rest of the day was spent in sort of a haze... two more planes had crashed... our doctor had a daughter who had just returned from New York... a nurse heard on TV there was a plane missing from radar in the Houston area (we'd make a nice combustible target)... rumors flew everywhere while the country waited for the non-existent next shoe to fall.
When my brain is overwhelmed, songs get stuck through my head in an endless loop. The song that played in my head was Simon & Garfunkel's "America". Not sure why, it's a nice song but not really a favorite or anything. I had always thought that when something of this magnitude actually happened, I would hear R.E.M.'s "It's the End of the World as We Know It", always seemed the logical choice.
We sat and diligently watched the first 9/11 telethon, and when the second one aired we settled in to watch it also (yes, we sat through the entire thing). A single spotlight came up and there sat David Bowie cross-legged on a darkened stage with a little synthesizer. As soon as he began to sing, I realized it was "America", the song that had been running through my head non-stop since the attacks. I screamed outloud, scaring the hell out of my husband, who couldn't even recall the original song in his head. But I realized right there that David Bowie IS psychic or some sort of preternatural being.
I pre-ordered the special edition of "Heathen" (with the bonus CD) with high hopes and wasn't disappointed by even a single song. I haven't been able to stop playing it since I received it...

On the CD turntable for the evening of 9/11:
David Bowie ?Heathen Discs 1 & 2 (see 9/11 rant for explanation of this and S&G)
Simon and Garfunkel's ?Greatest Hits
Suzanne Vega Songs in Red and Gray
Kim Wilde's self titled 1981 CD (oop, ?closest match), perhaps because of "Kids in America", or perhaps just a flashback to my carefree youth...